So much is going on right now. In my head and in my life.
Yesterday I took a walk with Roxy and I had some time to clear my head and think some. It was cold out so I didn’t enjoy the weather. I was trying to find joy in my walk so I worked on obedience with Roxy teaching her to heel and walk right next to me. She is very eager to please so it was really easy. Also, I took some photos with my phone to take a minute to enjoy nature and enjoy life when I didn’t want to.
This morning I got a call from Dealer Tire. I didn’t get the job. It is tough to hear, I am not going to lie. Their was a candidate that fit the position better. I am over qualified in personality and with my education but I need to be the judge of how happy I would be I am tired of others judging that for me. I get that they had to do what is best for the company and for the position. I am not going to pretend like it isn’t hard or that I am not getting really beat down because I am. This is when persistence comes to play. Hope. Hope that soon I will find what I am meant to do and where I am meant to go. I know it will work out. I know that. Doesn’t mean that today it isn’t hard.
I am struggling to stay positive, especially today. Especially right now. Especially with everything going on in my world and my mind.
Today is a bad day. I built it up in my mind that it would be and I didn’t let myself down. I am sure if I told myself it would be good, I would have made it good. I get bad days. I allow myself that. I know that bad days are short and go quickly. So I allow myself bad days. The pain I have felt, the mistakes I have made, the emotions I feel are allowed. What I am going through will make me stronger. It already has. I am a better person. Doesn’t mean what happened a year ago doesn’t hurt and today I get a bad day. I acknowledge that by giving myself the time to have a bad day means I will do the work to make the future a better one.